Olivia Wilde Reveals Hollywood Star’s Advice on Criticism

Some career-defining controversies fade quietly. Olivia Wilde’s never really did — until Pamela Anderson, of all people, told her how to carry it.

On the June 17 episode of Call Her Daddy, Wilde told host Alex Cooper that after watching Anderson’s 2023 documentary Pamela, A Love Story, she reached out simply to say she admired her. Anderson, who knew what Wilde was going through, wrote back: “The most rebellious thing you can do is stay soft. Don’t let it harden you.” That single line, Wilde said, has stayed with her for nearly four years.

The Storm She’s Describing

To understand why that advice mattered, it helps to revisit what Wilde was actually navigating. Don’t Worry Darling‘s 2022 press cycle became one of the messiest in recent memory: a rumored on-stage spitting incident between Harry Styles and Chris Pine at the Venice Film Festival (which Pine later denied to Esquire), a viral non-photo with star Florence Pugh that fans read as a feud, and the widely reported moment Wilde was served custody documents while presenting footage at CinemaCon. Her relationship with Styles, then her co-star, only intensified the scrutiny — and ended not long after.

Why “Staying Soft” Was Actually the Harder Choice

What makes this story more than a feel-good anecdote is the strategy Wilde initially chose instead. She tried to project composure — what she now calls performing “Teflon.” But that instinct, common among public figures under siege, often backfires: audiences read controlled silence as guilt or coldness rather than restraint. Wilde herself now admits her attempt to “rise above it” came across as inauthentic, ironically deepening the villain narrative the tabloids had already written for her.

This isn’t a new pattern. Celebrities from Britney Spears to Meghan Markle have faced similar dynamics, where stoicism under media pressure was mistaken for evidence rather than coping. Anderson’s own decades of tabloid treatment in the 1990s — the subject of her documentary — gave her firsthand authority on the subject, which is likely why her message landed differently than standard PR advice would have.

What Happens Next

The timing of Wilde’s disclosure isn’t incidental. She returns to the director’s chair this month with The Invite, her first project since the Darling saga, putting her back in the position of facing public judgment on a new film. Whether audiences extend the grace she’s now publicly asking for — value in visible vulnerability over manufactured strength — may shape how this next release is received.

For now, Wilde’s takeaway is less about Anderson specifically and more about a broader recalibration: resilience isn’t always armor. Sometimes it’s the willingness to admit something hurt.